Update on a phone play...

Remember how I said I was writing a play- entirely on my phone...? I do.

Well- here's a sample of how its goin': Tentatively I'm calling it "A Priest, A Widow and A Foreigner..."

SCENE ONE

A hot light hits a square, metal table that is holding a tape recorder, a lamp and an ashtray. Smoke wafts from that ashtray- wafts into the eyes of the man sitting behind it.

This man hasn't slept in quite some time- his bloodshot, swelling eyes are proof of this. His clothes give little away about who he is- maybe just how he is... a sweater and tie perhaps.

He's quiet spoken for an Irishman. He's Campbell-

CAMPBELL: I get it. I do. I am not the most looked up to man in the area. But that's my job. My calling. (beat) I call a spade a spade and a sinner a sinner. If he doesn't like it he can change his ways or leave the church- It doesn't matter to me- I'm not here to save anyone- I'm here for those who want to be saved. (beat) I don't think she wanted to be saved. Just- You know what I think? I think that people couldn't stand the sight of us. And I do not blame them- we shouldna tried keeping what we- (beat) I canna even look at the building without feeling her hand in mine.

A different light raises now- not so hot, colder... Much colder... winter.

Dressed appropriately - a young, normal looking woman, normal looking but beautiful to some- stands staring up above us- she is in awe of something. Campbell speaks from the dark and joins her side.

CAMPBELL: She's over a thousand years old.

GIRL: She?

CAMPBELL: (smiling) Ay, all beautiful buildings are feminine.

GIRL: Wow. Wasn't that smooth?

CAMPBELL: I guess it was- you're American?

GIRL: No.

CAMPBELL: No?

GIRL: I'm Canadian.

CAMPBELL: Really?

GIRL: No.

CAMPBELL: Cute.

GIRL: Thanks.

They now stand in silence. Each waiting for the other to speak first.

CAMPBELL: What brings you to these hallowed grounds?

GIRL: Boredom.

CAMPBELL: (he laughs) I hate to break this to you but church isn't all too exciting...

GIRL: Yes. But I was cooped up in my room. Hopped a plane then a bus- found my way on to a mail truck and this is where I am.

CAMPBELL: (smiling) I am so terribly sorry.

GIRL: I'm not. Its perfect.

CAMPBELL: Ay, it is isn't it?

A deep clang of church bells.

CAMPBELL: That's my cue.

GIRL: Wait. What's your name?

CAMPBELL: Campbell.

GIRL: Is that a first name?

CAMPBELL: Most people call me Father.

GIRL: Oh. (beat) Good to meet you.

She removes her glove and shakes his hand. He notices how soft the skin of her hands are... nothing creepy though.

CAMPBELL: Ay, I hope to see you around.

He almost makes it off stage-

GIRL: Father Campbell!

CAMPBELL: Yes?

GIRL: Do you usually flirt with foreigners?

CAMPBELL: ...no... I don't think so.

They both smile at this. And now we're back at that dreadful hot light and table. Somebody new is sitting behind it. I wonder who it is-

My brother has tied the proverbial knot.

Whelp- Jaelan, my older brother, the one above Jordan and below Jenna in the age range of siblings, is married. That's right, he finally went through with it! And as a joke on me- he had me do a "Tribute to Marriage" at the wedding- and in true form I wrote it ten minutes before being called up to speak... and it slew! slayed? slayn? killed!

I'm waiting until I can see a copy of the video - so I can give you a true, word for word transcript of how I actually said things- because to be perfectly honest... I don't remember- kind of a blur.

So... watch for that-

a novel idea

I am writing a play. On my phone.

New Sunset/Death Logline...

Three quarters of the population of the world has disappeared and Grady, an everyman, is left isolated and guilty.

Set in the remote back roads of a deserted nation, Grady's journey brings him face to face with life threatening situations coupled with a list of unique characters that steer him on his journey- and in his struggle to live vs. his willingness to go on.

What does life matter to a person inflicted with the internal perspective of insignificance?

What do you think?

A close an' intimate union.

Until recently I's been unda da impression dat it would be pertinent to da success a my ongoin' endeavors to find a partna in crime.

I's used to t'ink dat if I'm gonna to be taken down: d'are best be some unsuspectin' schlo'mo to take wit' me...

I aint goin' dis alone!

So- I soyched for dat poyson- left an' right- up an' down- backs an' fort. I's looked so hard that my aforementioned "endeavors" began lackin'. Success in dis woyld a mine is eva' loomin'- But I's aint found it on account a dat undyin' soych for a numba dos.

Well, you's prolly t'inkin' to yo'se'f- if you jest stop lookin'... that no good, dirty rottin', banana griftin', son-of-a bees knees will most likely find d'are way ta you- its da way a da woyld. D'are's no way ta choose who's gonna be willin' to take a bullet fors ya.

Trute be told- yous prolly correct in that assumption. IF I's was wantin' a partna in crime, still.

Ya see- as I watched myself becomin' a useless schlub an' all da opulence a dis woyld slippin' troo my finga's on account a said schlubbyness- I cames to da real-i-zation dat if I's gonna be numba uno- I's gotsta go it alone.

I aint neva' gettin' married.

Imagine2

I did this cover of a song today... for the fun of it...

Imagine2.mp3

My Little Room.

My little door looks out on youth, beauty, rebellion, compulsion and obsession. All Captive.

My little window sees the same, but not. Outside not in.

My little corner is mine. The threat of the outside close at hand. Halted by the twist of brass.

The top 3 "Terrible Movies" I want to make knowing full well that they're going to be terrible...

Its a long title but I couldn't really condense it and get my meaning across properly... They aren't the "Top 5 movies I want to make" by a long shot- and I don't want to make terrible movies... if that makes sense.

ANYway- what we're looking at here is a list of these terrible films, a short description, and why I want to make it... starting with number 5!

#3 - DEATH FACTORY

"Five strangers trapped in the halls of an abandoned textile factory are hunted by evil and haunted by their past."

So- you may have read in my previous post why I'm writing this- but- as I write- I realize how badly I want to make the movie as well... You know- so it doesn't come across as terrible as one of the many terrible SciFi channel directors would make it.

Don't get me wrong, it'll still be über terrible, but just- in that fun kind of terrible sense of the word.

#2 - Return of the Living Dead Part III

"Back from the dead and hungry for more."
(Secret Military compounds, hobos and zombies... need more be said?)

You're asking yourself right now- why in the shizzle would this man want to RE-make a terribly terrible film!?

Actually, you're probably not asking yourself that because you're probably wondering to yourself if a movie like RotLDp3 has actually been made in the first place! Well, I'm here to tell you that it has and when I sat on my parents couch that cold October evening watching this movie I realized- with different direction the movie could actually have a lot of heart (especially the Riverman's monologue) and some extremely cheap scares...

I dunno- it would be a blast on and off the set!

#1 - 101 ways to wok your dog."Kung Fu stir fry has NEVER tasted so good..."

I'm going to be 100% honest with you right now... I have no story for this one yet- just concept: Kung Fu film... the only reason I want to make this movie is because of the title.

Who wouldn't watch a Kung Fu movie with this name!?

Alright- that's my list. Maybe someday when I am in the midst of making good movies I can throw some of these in. Who knows?