This Year's Goal:

I need to Direct a movie.

Not a short.

Not a music video.

Not even a television episode.

A movie.

From the moment I discovered movies- which was before I can even remember- I'm sure I was still just a baby- I've wanted to work in film...

I never wanted to be a fireman, astronaut, policeman or even cowboy. I wanted to make movies. (even though for a few months after seeing the movie Jurassic Park I was interested in Paleontology as a 'back-up'...but I digress-)

When I was 11 I decided on my first career path: Stuntman. I took Karate, I taught myself to tumble, to take a punch, to throw a punch- by the time I was 14 I could run up walls and do a back flip (I'm probably too "pleasantly plump" now, but when I get back into shape!).

I could be realistically and safely hit by cars at 15 and the joy of staging realistic looking 'brawls' in parking lots and shopping malls never really left me until after high school.

I had been working, since I was 12 for a small video game company known as Shoqwave Multimedia (THANK YOU the internet archive for showing it from when I worked there... check out what it is today at www.shoqwave.com)

My job was to create interesting and unique backdrops for levels on a video game being made in the tradition of Myst and Riven.

Well, one day- the owner of the company handed me a video tape with all of our works cut to music. really cheesy slide-show presentation style- but what captured my attention was not how much better my backdrops were than anyone else's- but the fact that he had put it together on a Computer. He had EDITED A MOVIE ON A COMPUTER!

That's the moment I decided what I wanted to be- I didn't know it yet- but I had decided it.

Shortly after that I was in high school- I was 16 and I was taking a classe in the multimedia- just to get me close to the editing stations- it wasn't long before I rarely left the editing room-

In fact, don't tell my parents, but I would oft miss my classes to cut together a short film or PSA or to watch a movie on the big screen in the corner- which was in essence- my big screen.

I spent the majority of my senior year cutting the graduation video behind a castle of Dr. Pepper cans in a dark corner of the room... I spent so much time there they practically gave me a key!

Hell, I met my first official girlfriend in that editing lab. My first exposure to Napster and free music was there. Live television and broadcast news- Editing with headphones- even my first rival spawned from that noisy little room-

That room of Apple Computer's is where I learned to make movies. Its where I taught myself the technical side of film.

The first film I ever edited was- without a doubt- crap. There were maybe 5 different camera angles in the film- But- I'm thankful for the film- it was a HUGE learning experience-

how? how could you have learned from crap? you ask. I'll tell you.

The first lesson I ever learned as an editor was simple: You can't edit something if there's nothing to edit.

We had 5 shots that went in order from beginning of movie to end. Not a whole lot to edit together- not something that'd really build my editing muscle- So- the next project we did- I made sure we got more coverage- stuff to play with at the editing bench. Different angles etc.

This film was also crap. But this time I recognized that the new coverage was there- but it didn't cut together well because it didn't look right- it wasn't framed properly... which taught me as a camera man- over time- with practice- how to do that!

Every project taught me something new and became a platform to practice what I'd already learned: "hey- its framed well but the acting is weird-" so I learned eventually how to get a performance- "I've got a performance, but what they're saying is off-" it helped my writing. "what they're saying is right- but I can't hear it" -fixed the sound.

It has gone on like this for years- Lighting, sound, camera, acting, writing, art direction, costume- its how I learned to make movies. Every new skill building into a sort of mountain shaped skill set- with editing being my base...

It wasn't until just recently- within the last few years- that I realized I wasn't building a mountain towards being a good film maker per say... I was putting the tools together to tell a good story. All the pieces of a puzzle creating the big picture-

8 years ago, I decided I was going to be storyteller. I didn't know it until now. But I had decided it.

So, this year, and I mean this year- I want to direct a movie- not a short- not a music video- not even an episode of TV.

A movie.